Teachers Predict Hilarious Things They’ll Have to Say If Masks Are Required in School


Masks in school

There is a lot of debate around masks being worn in schools. While many teachers think it might be necessary, they know it’s going to cause a lot more headaches and distractions in the classroom. So we asked teachers on our Facebook page to predict a few things they think they’ll be saying every day in school next year (if masks are made mandatory for everyone), and the responses were pretty hilarious!

1. “Who said that?” *Classroom full of students with masks just look at each other with eyes of conspiracy*

2. “You cannot trade your mask with Johnny because his looks cool. You have to wear your own mask…all day…every day..No! You can’t sell him your mask!”

3. “You shouldn’t try to drink through your mask.”

4. “It’s not an eye mask.”

5. “No, you can’t share your mask.”

6. “No, you can’t pour snacks in your mask and ‘eat like a horse’ during class!”

7. “Masks are not slingshots!”

8. “Are you vaping under your mask?” (at the high school level)

9. “No, you can’t use your mask as a Kleenex!”

10. “Why is your mask wet? You just came out of the bathroom!”

11. “Stop licking your mask. yes we can tell, there’s a wet spot.”

12. “Please use your outside voices. I can’t hear you.”

13. “I’m sorry you sneezed in your mask and now there’s snot touching you. At least you understand why we wear them now.”

14. “No, your underwear doesn’t work as a mask.”

15. “Stop breathing on each other!”

16. “Where is your mask? Well, when is the last time you remember having it on?”

17. “Don’t take your mask off to sneeze!”

18. “Please don’t chew on your mask!”

19. “No, you can’t fill your mask with Takis.”

20. “Yes, your mask has to cover your nose too!”

21. “No…I don’t have an extra mask you can borrow.”

22. “No, I’m not going to smell your mask.”

23. “Your mask is not a blindfold.”

24. “No, you cannot use your mask when toilet paper runs out in the bathroom.”

25. “No! You can’t just go home every time you ‘lose’ your mask.”

26. “Stop farting into Billy’s mask…I don’t care if he thinks he’s Captain FartMask.”

27. “No, you are not a pirate and your mask is not an eye patch!”

28. “Your mask is not underwear! Take it off your butt and put it over your mouth and nose right now!”

29. “You’re not keeping germs OUT of your nose and mouth if your finger is making its way IN…”

30. “Did you just laugh at me? Who is laughing right now?”

31. “Your mask is not a necklace or a bracelet, put it on your face!”

32. “No, just because you wear a mask does not mean you don’t have to brush your teeth.”

33. “Whose mask is this on the floor? Whose mask is this in the toilet?”

34. “I can still see you picking your nose even though you’re wearing a mask. Please sanitize.”

35. “Your mask is not a phone holder.”

37. “We don’t eat our masks.”

38. “No, I’m not eating candy. This is just a candy scented mask.”

39. “Stop snapping your elastics.”

40. “OMG! You just threw up what in your mask?”

41. “Who is that talking while I am trying to teach?”

42. “Boogies go in a tissue, not your mask!”

43. “Are you chewing gum under your mask?”

44. “Your mask is not a headband.”

45. “Your mask does not double as a codpiece. And who taught you that word?”

46. “What do you mean you can’t find your mask? You had it on when you came in and you haven’t left your desk!”

47. “I don’t care if the Hot Cheeto dust is stinging your nostrils, put your mask back on.”

48. “Why does your mask have eye holes and isn’t covering your mouth?”

49. “I know it’s not easy to breathe but cutting a hole in it defeats its purpose!”

50. “Don’t run with your mask over your eyes!”

51. “You used your mask to wipe what???”

52. “No, you may not trade masks with Jane because she has a crystal-encrusted unicorn mask and you have a plain mask. We have to wear our own masks, please.”

53. “Who drew a penis on his mask?”

54. “We don’t blow our nose in our masks.”

55. “It’s a mask, not a chin guard.”

56. “Your mask is not a Yarmulke.”

57. “Take the mask off your chest, it’s not a bra.”

58. “You are not a ninja, I can still see you.”

59. “Who keeps making those animal noises?”

60. “If I see you looking at the inside of your mask during the test, I’ll assume you’re cheating.”

61. “Can you hear me now?”

62. “Luke, I’m not your father.”

63. “No, you cannot draw on your masks.”

64. “I’m Batman!”

65. “Please stop sucking on your mask.”

66. “Are you biting your nails or picking your nose? Either way, please stop.”

67. “If you snap her mask’s elastics one more time…”

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Teachers Predict Hilarious Things They'll Have to Say If Masks Are Required in School

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