Real Talk
Dear Parents – welcome to the next grade! This year we will be learning many new things, and hopefully, our class will be having a lot of fun together in the process. My job is to teach your child. In order for me to do that, there are a few things I hope you will be working on at home—things I cannot teach your child but that are crucial for making learning easier and school more pleasant for everyone.
Respect
Many of us were raised on John Hughes films or the Disney Channel, both of which flout respect for adults—particularly parents and teachers. Because of this, even as adults, our own grasp of proper respect can be a bit shaky. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, respect is defined as, politeness, honor, and care shown toward someone or something that is consideredimportant. The key phrase here, of course, is “considered important.” In order for learning to take place, you and your child must consider her education important and regard me as an important key to receiving an education.
Too often, however, we (even teachers) confuse grades with education. As a result children and parents often demand that teachers structure their lessons and expectations accordingly. If you think helping your child get a good grade is my primary job, then everything I do that hinders that—like sticking to due dates, enforcing difficult standards, or assigning challenging material—will feel to you like I’m not doing my job. And believe me, once you start to disrespect me and the job I’m doing, your child will too.
Please encourage your child to respect and honor their education. Please talk to your child about being polite and considerate to me and to other learners. Getting an education is truly an honor and a privilege, and so is being an educator. If we all keep that in mind, we can build a culture of true respect that will make learning possible.
Work Ethic
If your child develops a deep respect for education, they will be more likely to put in the work necessary to learn and grow. But the reverse is also true. A child who works hard will have greater respect and appreciation for the learning process, and they are more likely to value what they have achieved. Please encourage your child not to cut corners or to just get by. Teach them that there is value in struggling and working through difficult, frustrating, and even boring lessons.
By giving your child chores and responsibilities at home and insisting they do them completely and satisfactorily, you will be teaching them valuable lessons about powering through difficult or tedious tasks. A strong work ethic at home will not only translate to more success in school, but it will help your child develop the skill he needs for greater success in life.
Attention Span
Kids today have had information and entertainment at their fingertips since before they could walk. And while this might be useful for long road trips or finding out the capital of Wisconsin, instant access to knowledge and distraction does not always serve children well in the classroom. Please, please, read to your children or set aside time for them to read on their own. Tell them stories. Give them blocks and dress-up clothes and toys that actually require imagination rather than usurp it. And by all means, let them get bored—then let them figure out a not-digital way out of boredom. Doing these things, these once-common childhood activities is far more likely to prepare your child to focus and learn than any enrichment programs or educational games.
Kindness
No matter what else you teach your child about learning or how well prepared they are to learn, if our classroom is not a place where everyone feels safe and accepted, no one will be at their best. Of course, the best way to teach kindness is to model it, but that is rarely enough. Kindness must be explicitly and intentionally taught. Talk to your child about being inclusive. Tell them about the harm and hurt that comes from gossip and meanness. And give them specific tools for helping others feel seen, valued, and included. Teach your child to be the one who says, “Sit with us.” and “Come play with us.” And warn them that being kind isn’t always easy. It doesn’t even always feel good. But it is always the right thing to do.
Self-control
Children are struggling to sit still and even to have basic control over their bodies. They wiggle and fidget. They fall out of their desks. And they can’t seem to keep their hands to themselves. The sad reality is that some causes of this sort of behavior are out of your control or mine. The structure of the modern school day does not allow for adequate time for play and movement, and this is having a negative effect on student behavior. Still, there are things you can do at home. The most important thing is to limit screen time and insist your child play–preferably outside. Time spent being physically active isn’t just goofing off. It actually helps your child behave better at school and at home.
Attitude
I need your child to come to school with the expectation that some things we do will be difficult or even boring. And that’s okay. Learning can be fun and exciting, but it can also be hard and tedious. If you allow your child to continually gripe and complain about the things they don’t want to do (at home or at school), it only makes things harder for them and for me. Your child doesn’t have to love everything we do in class, but they do need to approach learning with a positive, can-do approach.
The truth is, I not only teach your child the education standards of this new grade, but I teach all these other life skills too. But if my students are going to learn the material for our class, my primary job cannot be teaching them how to work hard and behave well. They have to come to class already knowing these things, and that has to come first and foremost from home. It has to come from you.
I am looking forward to this school year. I am sure with your help and cooperation, it will be a great one!
Warmest regards,
Your child’s teacher
